The Transition Realization, part 2

As Anjay and I traveled through Varanasi together on my last leg of the journey, we just kept questioning who is closer to the truth? Not who has it better, not who’s more advanced, not- wow look at what they don’t have compared to us. No, the main question again was who really lives in the truth of freedom? Varanasi definitely forever changed me and my understanding of the world as I watched dead bodies burn at the ghats and then the bones offered to the Mother Ganga. I also saw lepers (leposy is very much a real thing in India) struggle on the streets and held my hands over a dying puppy in an alley, sending him reiki, knowing it’s best to let him pass then keep him alive. Not to mention the countless amounts of people bathing in pure toxic filth but in their minds the water is sacred, holy, pure and so to them that truth is a reality. They have no definition of dirty and so they simply don’t see dirt (at least not the way we see dirt). It’s all the human mind’s perception and so instead they see beauty. Beauty in all that they have, including death. It’s known as the spiritual capital of the world and death is very much a part of life in Varanasi. They truly live in the understanding that we are spiritual beings having a human experience and not human beings having a spiritual experience and it’s incredible. Incredible India! Right? Their daily lives are filled with worship and spirituality. It’s such a powerful force of surrendering to the higher consciousness that it only makes sense through chaos. Only re-enforcing the idea that things don’t have to be linear. The temples were breathtaking, overwhelming, and stunning but they’re also a bit spooky, intense, and strange. The strangeness comes from the energy of the people. The idea that spirituality is this notion of tranquility and meditative bliss through the silence of the divine and you truly connecting in spirit couldn’t be more off when it comes to the temples of Varanasi. Well at least what I saw, granted it was Shivarati. What I was exposed to felt a little more like Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom. It was the most intense thing I’ve ever experienced and was in no way calming as lines of hundreds of people forcefully shoved themselves into the small room and obsessively worshiped the statue on the altar. It was so crazy that the Indian army patrol the main temple of Shiva, and I actually saw one guard hit a woman on the head and kick her out of the way because she was in some spastic trance as she kept chanting and rubbing the Shiva Lingum while pouring milk over it. At this point it wouldn’t have been out of the norm for some real Indiana Jones shit like say some Sadhu possibly ripping someone’s heart out as an offering and that person gladly giving up their heart all in the name of Lord Shiva! Om Namah Shivaya!

However, on a more personal level and not something so intense, I can share what I specifically took away from India and that is the power of the word and honoring commitments big or small. Coming from 10 years in the land of supreme bullshit- Hollywood- I realized that I too adapted to a level of bullshit through my words. Here you can say really whatever you want and whether it’s true or not really isn’t the point. I’ve grown accustom to the façade. Oh we’re definitely making your movie, we will hire you for that project, yes I am going to the party, I do own a production company even a simple… I’ll call you right back is nothing more than a smoke and mirrors party where the smoke is usually marijuana and the mirrors are used for cocaine.  Yep it’s quite the rave the Entertainment Industry’s got going over here in the west of the West. Therefore I caught myself several times throughout my journey just saying yes to people to get them to go away knowing full well I was not going to meet them for that coffee or go on their tour or even buy that plane ticket which ended up costing me $60.  I just said sure not thinking the man would actually purchase the ticket first before I paid him. I figured I’d just disappear and get the ticket cheaper somewhere else without just telling him that in the first place. You are held accountable for your word no matter how small you may think it is. If you casually say in passing them on the streets sure I’ll go on that tour… then that means you are 100% going on that tour and they are waiting for you to show up. If you say I’ll come back tomorrow. The next day they will wait outside until you pass by and then expect you to get that piece of jewelry you were looking at. Yet all across America, shoppers are constantly telling the salespeople they’ll “be back tomorrow” and it means nothing. Instead, it’s what we’ve created as a polite way to tell people no, essentially by telling a lie, where at the end of the day no one is hurt. However what it does is further enforce our own denial of truth and how to live in it. Does it not? But yes, my words were put under scrutiny as I found myself flaking out a lot because plans would change or something better would come along or I just no longer felt like doing it at that time. I really caught myself in McLeod Ganj when I was truly by myself and I had to actively work on being more cautious as well as true to my word for the rest of the trip. It’s definitely something I’m taking with me as I gear up to re-enter the Hollywood arena where bullshit’s served like hot dogs. Get it while it’s hot!  But I also know I can only hold myself accountable and no one else. Let’s play ball!

The transition realization, part 1

Hello everyone and I apologize for the delay in posts. While I was in India I actually sold my condo! Yep, I’ve been trying to sell that thing for years and of course it finally happens whilst in India. I was sitting next to a chanting Tibetan Monk at the Green Hotel café just e-signing away my place, laughing at the irony of it all. Oh, what magic! It could not have been more perfect. However, that meant the second I hit US soil I pretty much had to be out. I had precisely 7 days to find a new place to live as well as move out of my place I’ve been in for 7 years. It was one of the craziest weeks of my life but India certainly prepared me for it. I spent the days frantically driving around West LA looking at horrid, cat liter box sized, carpeted nightmares to possibly live in. Then spent all night packing up my entire life. It’s insane how much one human can accumulate in a couple of years. I made four trips to Goodwill with my SUV packed to capacity, sold things on Craigslist, gave away furniture, dropped food off at the food bank, and still had 15 boxes full of crap I needed to take with me.

After just coming from a place where I saw 10 people sharing one room with only the clothes on their backs as their “must haves.” I gotta say I couldn’t help but feel like quite the 1^st world asshole when I watched the movers lug my dishes, bed, bedding, and enough clothing  to provide for a whole block of people into the truck to be brought to a new space I will live in alone and share with no one but myself.  Good God we come with so much baggage here! Simplicity definitely keeps you free. But as Americans we’re conditioned to think we need all these lavish things in order to survive, like we’ll die without that down comforter or pea coat from JCrew. And trust me, I’ll be the first one to admit that pea coat is damn cute!

It will be 2 months since India on Monday and honestly it’s like it was all a dream. Did it actually happen? Was I really exposed to a reality that exists so far separate from mine? But it’s not even about mine. I’m talking on a level of what we have, are, get, live, and experience as Westerners versus what they get to experience as Easterners. My specific life and how it differs… Well that’s more like when we all had the pleasure of realizing Billy Ray Cyrus had a daughter- it takes ridiculousness and shocking to a whole new level.  As if Achy Breaky Heart wasn’t enough. I realized so many unnecessary things about my life like my Mom telling me I should immediately buy a new place for an atrocious amount of money because God forbid you “piss your money away on rent” as if the concept of rent is somehow not living up to its duty of providing shelter for humans… A privilege a lot of people don’t enjoy in India. Not to mention, that kind of money could revolutionize an entire city there.

So yes, the transition back has been quite an intense one. First off, everything here is so quiet and orderly. Cars driving on the streets sound like nothing more than a casual ripple of a wave on a calm day at the beach. And I love how the cars we drive scream at you if you don’t put your seat belt on within seconds of turning it on. Meanwhile, in India 90% of the time you’re in a Tuk- Tuk where they simply laugh at your pathetic concerns for safety. There are no seat belts and they don’t need them, Incredible India! Oh yeah, that’s the saying there- Incredible India! Whenever something doesn’t make sense like, say driving up the middle of oncoming traffic in the heat of stampede hour (rush hour is an understatement there so I prefer to call it stampede hour- you truly never know what type of herd could be plowing towards you at any second in the wonderful adventures of Tuk-Tuking.) But yes, it is physically impossible that we’re not hitting anyone as we soar up the middle of oncoming traffic and what’s even more bizarre is the oncoming trafficteers response. No one is outraged by this. There’s no shouting, bird flipping, or cop calling. It just happens, all works out, and the flow remains uninterrupted. Fucking A, we’re still alive, how is this possible!? Slowly the westerner will gain their voice back and upon asking the driver to explain the unexplainable their single response will be- head bobble- INCREDIBLE INDIA! And that’s it, nothing more will nor needs to be said. 

Now cut back to America. As I sit at one of those 4 way stoplights by UCLA- the ones where all traffic is stopped while the pedestrians get to walk in all four directions and are even allowed to get a little wild by walking within the lines of the diagonal walkway that runs through the intersection. I clearly see just how well trained and obedient we are to the system. Like clockwork, the white man lights up on the traffic signal and the humans walk. The countdown begins and we safely make it across. Next the greenlight shines and the cars punctually accelerate. Honestly after India, watching all this feels very robotic. Nothing keeps you more alive than dodging through traffic and allowing yourself to have nothing but trust in this incomprehensible force- that you will in fact- not get hit. But it’s the truth, you don’t, and by the end of the trip I found myself not even looking as I casually cut across four lanes of traffic twisting one way to avoid a cow then turning another way to miss that cyclist. Abruptly stopping to let the Tuk- Tuk pass before maneuvering around a pile of shit to dart through an opening that only lasts a split second but voila! I am across and the whole moment is forgotten as quickly as it happened. Yet here I stand in LA on a street that looks like 90% of the other streets across upscale America. You know, the perfectly manicured trees and bushes, beep-beep sounds of cars locking on the command of their owner's key chains as they methodically walk to get their Starbucks. Lululemon-ed housewives systematically scurrying from store to store preoccupied by their smartphones, buildings all relatively the same size and color with cutesy lampposts decorating the sidewalks.  Yeah, you know the routine. There’s one in every town. 

So here I stand in what the media has sculpted as America’s dream and I find myself actually nervous as that ticking countdown flashes. What? It’s a total false sense of fear as well as security. Trust me if all hell broke loose in the world, India would be just fine and we’d be the ones who wouldn’t make it due to the sheer fact that we simply would not know how without rules and order. We’ve been trained well my friends. I mean, the fact that over here we are slowly shifting into a society that doesn’t even have to flush their own shit is somewhat unnecessary, is it not? Seriously, I am noticing more and more public bathrooms that have the automatic flushers installed on their toilets while in India most of the bathrooms don’t even have toilets. Quite the drastic gap, huh?  I see us becoming more and more dependent on a system that was created by humans for humans but is in no way human- of our human nature that is. 

    I’d have to say the biggest question I take away from this whole experience is: who here is more free? Is it us in the “1^st world” or them in the “3^rd world”? It’s shocking that we both in fact exist in THIS world. More to come...

From the spiritually incorrect to the spiritual capital of the world

The  last destination on my journey was Varanasi formerly known as the holy city of Baneres. Many gurus , swamis, and prophets achieved enlightenment here. Also, just outside of the city in a small place called Sarnath,  Buddha himself- Siddhartha Gutama- gave his first sermon after he came down from the mountain. Buddhism officially began here. It's the most intense, eye opening, and life changing place of my pilgrimage. 

     But before we get there I must close out Osho. On one of the last days I had a very bizarre encounter with one of the teachers there. This was my warning sign to proceed with caution when diving into these meditations like this, because you are literally playing with fire- the fire of your own sanity.  It's a very real thing to not be able to handle this new source of energy and evolution and to actually go crazy because of it. The world as you now know it becomes too much to handle. Kundalini yoga has the same dangers if not practiced right. Luckily I've always been reminded or kept in check so to speak. Before I even began kundalini yoga I had a dream where Buddha, the Dali Lama, and Krishna appeared to me in my mirror in my room (intense, I know). Now at this point I had absolutely no idea what Kundalini was and had only heard it once from a teacher who said something about it being the energy at the base of your spine, but I didn't even know a yoga practice existed for it.  In my dream they were telling me all sorts of things about something called "the awakening of the kundalini". When I woke up all I could remember was the three powerhouses whom appeared before me and Krishna saying this thing about the awakening of the kundalini. I got out of my bed and googled that exact phrase and the first thing that came up was a book on Amazon called: The Awakening of the Kundalini  by a guy known as Gopi Krishna! I thought that was pretty specific in connection with my dream and ordered it right away.  When it came, it was a very small book I finished  in two days, and the entire thing was basically a big warning sign. It spoke all about the cases in India of people losing it amongst many other things but that's mainly what I took away from it. However at that point the message was very random because I had no idea why I needed the warning or what it was for. Then a week later my friend, Aimee invited me to my first kundalini yoga class and it all made sense. 

    The warning at Osho came in the form of an actual person. After Dynamic one morning I was sitting at a table by myself, enjoying my breakfast, when I saw this wild looking woman speaking to herself. She was in the Osho teacher outfit which is an all black robe with a white belt, and I could feel she was going to come talk to me. Shit, it is way to early for this. Sure enough she asks me if she can sit down even though every other table is open in the whole area! She sits down and feels chaotic as she feverishly peels her orange, rubbing each slice on her lips before quickly devouring it. Uncomfortably weird. As I'm looking at her I know there's a message in all this and I start to realize she looks exactly like me! She's like an older, say about 65, version of myself. As I'm thinking this she meets my eyes and says: "oh you're wild too, I can feel it. Yep (pointing her finger at me) you're wild alright. It's our red hair. That red hair. That red hair!" Then she spits out some gibberish and darts her eyes around. I am literally terrified of everything- how she looks like me, what she's saying, and the mere presence of her separate of myself. She's Dutch and tells me she comes here 7 months a year and just loves the gibberish meditations as she awkwardly spits out some more non sense. I am so creeped out I can't even stand it when suddenly a guy walks over and thanks her for the amazing meditation she held the other day and how it was so powerful and beautiful and really helped him a lot!! Ok, now I'm in a sheer state of flabbergasted confusion. I mean, this woman has clearly lost her mind yet still effective for others??  Then just as quickly as she came, she just fluttered away, leaving me deep in thought. Whether it was a warning or not, I chose to take it as such and decided to take a break from meditation that afternoon, taking only a Bollywood dance class,  and didn't do dynamic the next day either. 

     When it was time to leave, I was ready to go. I hit the airport to begin yet another strenuous excursion of tuk-tuk to plane to cab to train to tuk-tuk. I left Pune at 9am and didn't arrive in Varanasi until 11am the next day. I met my friend Anjay in Delhi. He gave me a lot of gear before I left for India as he has made a documentary about his journey to find his family here a couple of years ago. It was amazing, halfway through my trip he just decided he had to join me and booked a ticket on a whim to come help me film in Varanasi! Awesome, right? What's even more amazing is the fact that he and I went to the same high school and college together yet didn't meet until LA. We've pretty much been on the same path since we were 14 but didn't meet until about 28. He's four years older than me so I couldn't help but laugh at say the senior passing the freshman in the halls of Fenwick and saying, yep one day we're gonna travel to India together! Or the frat boy behind the bar serving the underaged sorority girl a beer not knowing one day they'll be meditating in a Shiva temple together. Funny how life unfolds like that and eventually brings people to a meeting point. 

    Since Anjay is male, 6'2" and Indian I suggested we take an overnight sleeper train from Delhi to Varanasi for the experience of it.  And it was great! I loved every minute of it. We had second class which means we shared bunk beds with two other people. We arrived and found our travel buddies to be this old Indian couple. Anjay and I had the top bunks which was perfect for me but ridiculous for him because he's so tall. Haha. Next to us was another Indian man and a solo female traveler from Indiana. I've met so many remarkable women traveling alone in India and it makes me proud to now be apart of this tribe as it's something I have always, always wanted to do.  We bunked up for 17hours and I actually had a pretty comfortable night's sleep.  However Anjay was pretty restless and told me later the Indian man below me was just ripping ass the whole night, he said it was so loud it was unbelievable. Ah hahaha. I totally did not hear this bc I slept with my music in the whole time. 

    As we're getting off the train the next morning we find out it's Shivarati! This is one of the biggest festivals in all of India and the fact that we happen to be in Varanasi for it is the equivalent of say, being in Bethlehem for Christmas. It's huge and this was totally unplanned! I've actually celebrated Shivarati the last two years in the states and suddenly here I am in the center of the motherland for the festival?! Incredible.  The festival is three days long. The first day is a wild all night celebration- the point is to not sleep and to keep your energy high, bathing in the potency of Shiva. We made our way down to the Ganges river for the night's puja. It was this beautiful ceremony of about eight guys dressed in stunning clothes doing this fire and smoke dance in honor of Shiva. The place was packed with thousands of people. Our tuk-tuk driver told us over a million people will migrate to Varanasi for Shivarati.  Anjay and I got to work immediately capturing everything with our cameras and it was all very powerful to be apart of. Afterwords everyone gives an offering of flowers and a lit candle to the river, releasing their intention for Shiva. It was here we realized this is definitely an intense city where the westerner will be shaked down for every possible rupee. I honestly have not had a problem my entire trip until Varanasi where the concept of fixed pay doesn't exist. Basically they start off by saying: pay as you like and look all spiritual and kind. Then you go to pay as you like and they immediately get angry and demand 1000 rupees which is preposterous! This woman straight up got into a fight with us demanding we pay her for the flower she insisted we send down the river and then refused to accept our 300 rupees because it wasn't 1000. It was mad! 1000 rupees is a lot and is definitely not the standard price for pretty much anything in India.

     After the puja is the insane block party. The streets are packed with people all night long. From infants to seniors to Saddus everyone is celebrating and most people are high on bhang lassi! It's a type of weed yogurt shake! Marijuana is illegal in India except for this one day out of the year where it is accepted as a part of the ritual. It is believed that by ingesting or smoking it on Shivarati it is known to connect you with the infinite source of the supreme as Shiva himself is connected to the powerful healing plant.  Very, very tempting to try, but I did not. However you certainly didn't need to be high to feel this intensity. There was a massive parade down the main street with elephants, camels, horses, bands, massive statues of several gods being charioted through the city. Music everywhere. Think St. Paddy's day in Chicago meets Cinco de Mayo in Mexico City and that's Shivarati in Varanasi! It was nuts. At one point I was stuck in what literally felt like a corral with all these people pushing their way through ( there is absolutely no concept of "personal space" here) when a massive cow appears in front of me. He's just in the line, slowly walking as he's a loud to do because the cows are definitely kings here, and I have to try and get past him somehow. If I don't the flow of traffic will push me right into his ass which could result in a swift hoof to the shin. There's no time to panic only to move as the shoving becomes more aggressive. I have no idea how I'm going to get past this thing, he's gi-normous! Finally I make an attempt to slip past him like the others and he turns to try and shove me with his horns!! I almost had a heart attack as I dodge them at the last second while screaming like an idiot. Meanwhile,  Anjay got the whole cow face off on film. Haha.  As the night went on a massive rainstorm broke out which you know is a gift from Shiva... And, as you also could imagine, 

us westerners without our umbrellas and proper rain gear simply had to call it quits.  We grabbed a tuk-tuk  which was almost impossible as every other westerner there was also fleeing the scene and ended up gratefully sharing one with a guy from Australia. As we drove back to the British Cantonment area, where we all comfortably stay away from the madness, we left the Indians to their fanatical rain dance that gives the other people we once so ignorantly called Indians, the Native Americans, quite a run for their money! Om Nameh Shivaya.  

The Trance Dancing Yogini knows Kung Fu!!

    To continue with my Matrix references because there’s honestly no better way to describe this, you know the part where Neo is in the all white room with Morpheus for the first time. Where he states that famous line… “I know Kung Fu” and then the two break into some serious sparring? Osho International was pretty much that, I mean, the Wachowski brothers must have gotten some of their inspiration here- to say the least.  First off, most of the meditations are held in a massive football field sized, marble pyramid that fits up to 5,000 people equipped with a cutting edge surround sound Bose stereo system. A moat of crystal clear water presents itself in front of the pyramid with a single strip up the middle for everyone to glide up as if walking on water (with our long dresses it definitely looks more like we’re gliding around this place than a boring old walk). (Ha). The second you enter it’s as if something stripes you of your density and you get to actually experience energy. Sure we can talk about energy all day and can feel it here and there, but inside this pyramid you become the energy you already are. It’s like you transform into a cell within your own body and finally get to experience what it means when people say: everything is energy. Your vibration truly becomes tangible. There are pyramids all over the complex and everything has a purpose from the power of using pyramids to the healing stones used to make them to the reason why we’re all in maroon dresses. 

      Ninety percent of the time everyone is dancing. Every meditation has at least 15 minutes of ecstatic dance included in it. Sometimes you’re dancing to amazing trance, other times it’s to some serious drum and base, and at other times it could be to some angelic violins. Again, everything serves a purpose and every sound projected out is set to a certain frequency and holds a certain power to help you release negativity as you dance your way back to your child-like nature. I swear I danced more at Osho than I did at the Coachella Music Festival two years ago and I was dead sober.  Outside they have this amazing white marbled dance floor that’s about half the size of a football field, known as the Buddha Grove. Everyday at noon a deejay would spin all sorts of unbelievable music from all over the world and people couldn’t resist but be drawn to the dance floor. The exotic trees created a lush canopy over the large stage as everyone melts into their own little, tiny dancer for the hour.  It’s incredible to watch the awkward, enormously tall, Dutch man move his hips to the beat of his own drum next to the small Japanese professional dancer who flows to rhythm like silk in the wind. Then there’s the young, wild-child with the dirty feet, head banging out of sync next to the exotically beautiful Indian elder, whom shifts with defined poise. Behind her is the dreadlocked Euro-gypsy spirit weaving (it’s a form of dance) with the picture perfect American ballerina, and it’s all just proof we can re-learn how to be completely free through the power of our own movement.  Dance is meditation. 

      Now, when I dive into the spiritually weird you have to understand I don’t just stand on the sidelines, point fingers, and laugh. Sure there’s definitely a lot of laughing and “this is bat shit crazy” moments, but I’m also here to see if this actually works, to learn, and of course to report back. Spread the word on insanity’s perhaps sanity. Therefore, I went for it! Over the course of seven days I participated in anywhere from 4-6 hours of meditation per day. Four out of the seven days I woke up at 5am to walk half a mile, in the blissful silence of darkness, by myself to the ashram for the 6am Dynamic Meditation. This is Osho’s most powerful meditation and it’s so intense! Everyone has a blindfold on because the experience is meant to be an individual one. Yes, you are with other energies but you want to keep your eyes closed the whole time because it’s about going in, external circumstances are irrelevant. This weird frequency, high-pitched noise, blasts out and the first 15 minutes is spent erratically breathing. The idea is to not make sense with your breath, to mix it up and disrupt its flow as much as possible. To confuse its linear pattern.  You breathe hard, fast, intense. Kinda like as if all of India was just a breath- fast, chaotic, no sense of order yet continues to flow with such life. Next, you SCREAM! You scream at the tops of your lungs, hit the floor, kick and punch the air, cry, howl, laugh... Whatever you feel like you need to do to get it out! 15 minutes of completely losing your shit! And it’s just that… lose all that shit… all that negativity that harbors inside of you. The insecurities, the hurt feelings, the sense of loss, the anger, the fear that resides deep in your cellular memory- SHOUT IT OUT! Release it with all your might. It’s called “consciously going mad”. Just go for it, everyone else is and no one cares. They’re not even there, remember? You’re alone and it’s a freaking soundproof pyramid! After that, the next 15 minutes is spent jumping up and down with your arms over your head shouting the mantra hoo! There’s so much that goes into this part. Chanting hoo is associated with Taoism, Sufism… it’s a specific vibration that resonates with your earth center allowing you to activate your core. Opening your mind and body up to the possibility of receiving new possibilities. Once you have hoo-ed it out you then stand completely still for 15 minutes and just receive and feel the energy coursing through your body. Let the awareness and messages come. After the stillness is the celebration! The dance! 15 minutes of free movement, just divinely dancing with yourself in whatever way feels necessary. At this point I couldn’t help but sneak a peak to see a grown man twirling around next to a woman sitting on the ground clapping next to another woman air guitaring next to… me, rolling on the ground. Haha, it’s what I wanted to do.  Good thing we were all in red and not white or I would’ve questioned the idea of whether or not I had been committed to the loony bin and didn’t realize it.

     This meditation was then followed by either Zen Archery class or Tai Chi in the Buddha Grove to help calm you back down, bring you back to the reality we must live in. Then the rest of the day was filled with meditations such as gong and laughing class, chakra breathing, silent sitting, Sufi whirling, and gibberish! The concept behind the gibberish meditation is to say everything you’ve always wanted to say but could never say, but say it in another language. This then confuses the mind/ego and allows you to wipe it clean, to disrupt its normal way of processing in order to allow room for clarity to come through in new ways. It’s said that if you’re having trouble sleeping just do even a minute of gibberish and you’ll be able to calm your mind to rest. 

         So where do I stand with all this? Well, I’m not devoting my life to Osho or calling him my guru or anything like that, but this process is no joke. I had so much come up for me especially over the 4 days of Dynamic Meditation. This was the part of the journey I was definitely seeking, the higher meditation techniques. Going deeper within the mind.  I went through a lot of layers like getting myself to the point where I actually heard myself cry the way I used to as an infant, as we all do as infants. I screamed so much that certain ones took me back to past lives where I was tortured and killed during the Middle Ages. At my very first Dynamic the thing that came up the most for me was Catholicism. Being a “recovering Catholic,” as Jillian likes to call it, (haha) I had so much emotion arise about how the Church forbids its Priests to truly experience love by convincing us that we have a God who tells us NO we can’t do certain things if we truly believe in him. It’s a religion and by definition that means- comes with limits… It only allows the soul to go so far when there’s so much more personal power we have in the ability to consciously co-create our lives with God. I studied Catholicism from Kindergarten all the way through college where I was a Religious Studies minor with a strong focus in Catholicism.  Therefore, I'd like to think I can speak from an educated standpoint on this feeling and no, this doesn’t happen to everyone, these meditations are not secretly making you go against the Church or anything idiotic like that. It’s an experience that is solely personal to me and my journey but it was a strong one. Again, it’s about finding that inner child and realizing there’s true wisdom inherent in all of us as children, but it’s through the clutter of knowledge that we lose sight of that wisdom as we become adults. However, it’s through meditations like these that we get to play again and find our own remembrance.

    A more pleasant moment was at the end of dancing one of the days, I opened my eyes and saw this beautiful, older Indian woman with a single stripe of gray in her hair, across the room. For whatever reason I absolutely had to hug her.  It was weird because I was actually thinking- am I really walking over to this woman right now? Am I just going to hug her? What the hell am I doing? But I couldn’t stop the feeling, it was too strong.  Halfway through the walk over she made eyes with me and knew what was happening. We hugged for a genuine amount of time and I felt as if she were a mother to me. I had so much love flowing through me that every pore was tingling. I was in pure ecstasy. We connected eyes, holding each other with a stare, and then moved our hands to our hearts, bowed, and went our separate ways. No worldly exchanges needed- my name is, I’m from, I do this… just pure human connectedness. Afterwards I walked to my phone and wrote the following: Once you open yourself up to the possibility that anything is possible you can begin to play with the idea that you might in fact know the very stranger that appears before you. That you’ve traveled with their spirit before on this earth as we are spiritual beings having a human experience not human beings having a spiritual experience. You can hug them for an extended amount of time, exchanging no words or names, and know in that moment you are fulfilling your spirit with a reconnection- a remembrance- as you dance your dance this time around and they dance theirs, separate of each other. Does this all sound mad to you? Well that’s exactly the point, going so far against the mainstream that the “stream” no longer exists for consciousness has now become a river and the point is to get to the ocean.  

Sat Nam. 

And the journey continues... Red robes, dancing, one nation under God

    I left McLeod Ganj on a 12hour bus ride, twisting and turning, jerking and twerking, down the Himalayas as if I was stuck on Big Thunder Mountain in Disneyland with Miley Cyrus for an entire day. It was that bad! I had severe motion sickness most of the time as I curled up in the fetal position with my OM scarf tied over my eyes and mantra music playing in my ears, hoping I wouldn’t reach the stage of vomit. And as if the motion sickness wasn’t enough, we can’t forget about the maniacal use of horns in India. This bus had the most asinine horn I have ever heard in my life and I’m pretty sure it was louder on the inside than out. Basically, every time I almost drifted out of my misery this horn, that was fit way more for a traveling circus of clowns, would blare its ridiculous carnival-like jingle causing me to jump up in disarray thinking I’ve won some sort oversized stuffed teddy bear. But no, I’ml just on a bus in India.  I was heading to Delhi in the middle of the night to wait in the airport for 5 more hours before catching a flight to Pune. I had been nervous about making this journey by myself for a couple days leading up to it. However, once again I was shown complete protection and safety by God. There were about 50-60 people on this bus and I just happened to sit across from this lovely Brazilian girl, named Maria, who also just happened to be going to the exact same location as I was and was even on my flight!! I mean, what are the chances?? In all of India, here we sit two solo female travelers, from different parts of the world, divinely connected and just like that I am no longer alone. It’s amazing how the two of us immediately shifted into the friend role with each other. You would have thought we’d known each other for years and it felt like it too. Instant radical trust. We were now a team on this adventure that took an entire 24hours to complete.

    Our destination was the Osho Ashram, well more like, The Osho Institute for Higher Meditation. Osho is a very famous Guru who passed in the 90’s but has left quite an imprint on society. He’s known as the “spiritually incorrect” Guru. He allows drinking and smoking in his ashram! He also teaches different, far out techniques to meditation and believes the mind can’t really be silent until you release it first- get the energy out. Go mad. Then sit still. Be and see the presence as the observer instead of the doer. He also has a lot of controversy over being labeled the “sex guru” and before you’re even allowed into the Institute you have to take and HIV test. Yes, I thought that was super weird and was resistant to it at first but I’m here for the experience, right? This place was on my agenda because Jillian’s boyfriend spent 7 years here- it’s like his Golden Temple and I was meeting them.  Now, I don’t know what went on in the 70’s, but I can assure you nothing sexually weird happened while I was there for the 7 days. 

    This place was certainly not some barebones ashram either. Instead it’s a state-of–the-art, technologically advanced, ecologically renowned sanctuary/ resort center. Seriously, like a slice of heaven on earth cut right out of India. Of course the place was about 90% Westerners. In fact, when I was there we had people from 100 different countries visiting. At any given time there are anywhere from 500-5,000 people at this Institute and it’s expensive.  Upon arrival, Maria met up with a Buddhist, Japanese Brazilian woman named Michele. She too was traveling India alone and the two of them were connected through a mutual friend but have never actually met. They went off to their expensive, pre-arranged hotel and I caught a tuk-tuk to take me to this place called “Popular Heights” that was supposed to be a cheap but decent place outside of the Osho Ashram. Definitely not so popular. And I should have known better when it had the word heights in the name. I arrive and it looks like a low-income housing unit you’d see in the seedy areas of the US. Thank God it was 3pm in the afternoon, giving me 3 hours of sunlight to find a new place ASAP! The guy was really nice about it and understood I was clearly not going to stay there. He let me store my massive bag with him and I just started walking up and down the street looking for an Internet café to get on Lonely Planet. Jillian is nowhere to be found and I can’t rely on her to help me find a place. At this point, our trips are very much separate ones now. I have no idea where anything is in relation to the Osho Ashram on Lonely Planet and I’m a little frazzled. I don’t even know where the ashram is at this point. But once again, I am always safe. The owner of the internet café picks up on the alarmed look I wear on my face and tells me there’s a great hotel literally around the corner and we’re only 4 blocks from Osho. He walks me over to the Surya Hotel and it’s perfect! It’s another westerner’s haven with this popular restaurant known as the Yogi Tree attached to it. I bargain with the guy and get my usual $17 a night rate and he sends a boy to get my luggage for me. Now I’m ready for this Osho business.

    After the HIV test you are then taken to the red robe store. Everyone on campus is only allowed to wear maroon robes so we're all on the same vibration. And when I say robe, I mean like those long dresses/kurtas they wear in the Matrix, not a bathrobe.  Yep, hundreds of people in matching floor length maroon dresses walking around, high on meditation… and you thought the white rat was bizarre. Ha. We had a half-day orientation all newcomers are required to go to and I have to say it’s quite surreal. There’s about 20 people in our group from Russia, Brazil, Germany, the Netherlands, England, Japan, India, and Australia.  They take us to this room where we learn Osho’s wild techniques for the major meditations, which consist of oooh… speaking in gibberish, screaming, shaking, twirling, jumping, and dancing. It’s like Kundalini Yoga on crack and Kundalini’s already quite cracky! They had music from every country in the world and we all got in a big circle as they played what would be considered popular songs for the country each person was from. They had to then lead everyone else in showing us how they dance in that country. It was great! Hilariously enough they played Madonna's “Like a Virgin” for the US.  The coolest part was at the end when we went around the room and shared our different ways of greeting one another that is custom to our country. It was so interesting to watch from the Australian’s one hand up- G’day mate to the Japanese bow to the Russian’s giant hug and triple kiss to the German's strict arm fully extended, hearty handshake to the Indian’s hands at heart, namaste. Cultures are so different yet here we all are, in one room together, bonding through the vehicles of English and dance. This is a place where humans can come and allow their conditions to melt, bringing us back to our child-like nature, which is a lot of what all spirituality is truly about. Letting go and in letting go you get to truly feel and see our oneness. No matter where we’re from we all desire the same things and those are love and happiness. As we all danced our last orientation dance we naturally made a train around the room… All countries effortlessly linking up with our smiles acting as the chain that allow us to remain connected on this path we all share, and I knew in that moment this Osho business was gonna be one extreme ride.  

 

Life in the Ganj

    All the men that work in the shops are really boys in their 20's and early 30's. After being here for awhile you start to understand there are different "unspoken of" territories on the streets. There's the Jogiwara road boys and the Temple road boys (the two main roads here). Then there's the Upper Temple road boys and the Lower Temple road boys. You see, it's not like America where if you work in a store you are confined to the walls of that location for the duration of the hours demanded from you. Instead, they all hang out in groups across the street from their stores. They're all basically selling the exact same stuff. The saying here is: the same, same but different. They work as a team and are always hustlin to help each other out. They're all "slashies". Coming from Hollywood this usually means bartender/ model, actress/ waiter, comedian/ nanny... Here it's shop owner/tour guide/ aruyvedic masseuse. They all want to give you a massage. For example, say a group of westerners walk into a shop, there's usually no one inside. But one of the boys will see this and immediately summon the one responsible for that shop. While waiting for him to return, that guy will act as the liaison. Then the store owner will enter and do his thing. If he's really good he'll find out that the group would love to go to a temple somewhere.  He will then reveal he can in fact take them right now if they'd like! Usually the westerners are immediately thrilled  over- what they think is a great find, not knowing everyone in town basically offers this service- and say yes for a good price, special price just for them... There's always a special price just for you. ;) At this point, the store owner has already made the call to one of his boys and by the time the westerners walk out of the shop, there's a car convienantly waiting. The guy hands over the car to the store owner while the other friend who was the liaison now takes over and watches the shop. The owner now jumps into the tour guide role and barrels down the road with the westerners. Then at the end of the day everyone involved gets a cut. The trick is which team of boys will get the westerners? Will it be the uppers or the lowers, or will it be the Jogiwara boys? The competition is obvious. It's an interesting play on the "it's all who you know" business model because you want to be connected to the guy who knows the best English, the guy who owns the car, and the guy with the best looking shop.  Essentially, it's the same same but different as in Corporate America. Is it not? Competition, alliances, hustle, the strong will prevail. 

    Another thing worth noting is all across India the men of all ages from boys to Seniors hold hands with each other. They either do the full on all five fingers intertwined or just connect at the pinky or the entire arm over the shoulder. It's something I'm still getting used to because it's a sign of brotherly love. Homosexuality is forbidden here but how the hell would you ever know with all the men arm and arm all over the place! It's sooooo the opposite of the men in America, who pretty much live by the secret code of never show any emotion. I can't help but laugh imagining my  brother and his life long friends just cruisin the streets, pinky fingers intertwined. Lol, I'm sure he's nervous even just reading this right now. Or how about my Father and his group of friends... Actually, I bet if it were socially acceptable in America his friends and him would be holding hands all over town! They're very close, so crazy how cultural conditioning causes such drastic gaps. How does it all work?  I know I've seen several pictures of my brother and all his friends as boys holding hands. Why not anymore? Are the Indians simply remaining true to their authentic child-like nature and we (westerners) have lost our way? As a woman, my friends and I hold hands whenever we want. But you wouldn't dare imagine two grown men in business suits holding hands as they walk around Chicago. Don't be ridiculous! Here. Totally normal. Just some thoughts passing through...

      Next are the women beggars with their babies strapped to their sides. Very different from the homeless in America. They don't want money here and won't accept it. They want you to buy them food. There are these, I guess you could call them grocery stands because they're not stores, where you can get giant bags of rice, milk, oil, butter, and other necessities. I tell them all no but there's one specific woman who I feel a connection to. Her little baby is so cute too. He holds my hand, smiles, and I instantly fall in love with him and she's way younger than me. I ended up taking her, another woman, and this young man shopping one of the days. They all got huge bags of rice, oil, and butter. A decent amount of money later, they're all happy. Now, I know they then go and sell that stuff but hey, either way they need it more than I do. It's a couple extra OM scarves less for me, but for them it's like a month's pay.  It's my way of showing Om Mani Padme Hum while in their land. The woman I felt connected to invited me to her home down in Dharamsala to meet the rest of her whole family and I really wanted to go too. You know, for the story of it. But my intuition told me no. I try to always say yes but you also have to listen to the No's as well. 

     And lets not forget about the amazing dogs of India and the devious monkeys. Up here all the dogs work together like a Police squad to keep the monkeys in the trees and off the streets.  One morning a female Tibetan monk and I stood on the corner of the street and watched quite the altercation. A group of large monkeys had made there way to a lower rooftop and you would have though we were in 101 Dalmatians- when all the puppies were stolen and they send out the dog cry to alert the town's canines. It was just like that. We hear two barks up the road and out of nowhere dogs explode from their houses, emerge from alleys, and race from the other streets. They certainly weren't monkeying around, this was the real deal, like it was a fire drill they had all practiced many times before. There was one hilariously fat wiener dog that was stuck down a huge staircase and couldn't get up to the action but even he was serving his part in the howling. The monkeys were springing from rooftop to rooftop, making huge sounds as they crashed on the tin roofs, purposely provoking the dogs. This woman in her red robe and shaved head and I just watched in awe. It was quite the scene while the humans had yet to really arise for the day.

     And there's your insider's look at life  in McLeod Ganj. After being up here for 16 days by yourself,  you get to stop playing tourist and start seeing the flow of the town's unique colors. Well, that's my observation at least. Life is but a sequence of scenes. How do you direct yours? 

The Adventures in ShaktiLand

   I'm getting pretty good at this solo traveling business and it's exactly what I always wanted to do but never could imagine actually pulling the trigger to Be. Here. Now. I've totally become one of those people who casually steps out of the way seconds before, what I had originally thought was Mr. Toad's Wild Ride, charges towards me. The horns? Mere background noise. Men intensely staring? Still happening but no longer uneasy. Tightly gripping the pepper spray? No more. Understanding some Hindi? Haanji (yes). Hold, squat, pee, pray? Mastered it. My head has begun to naturally bob back and forth like the Indians when I'm saying... It's ok, or sure or it doesn't matter to me. And I now understand the value of the rupee. 500 rupees is equivalent to about $8 so before I was shelling out 500's all over the place, thinking it was great! Now I realize that 500 rupees is actually a lot. It's more like $50 worth, whereas you can easily get about 4-5 full meals out of the bill.

      I've done so many things since I've been in McLeod Ganji and I've met so many great people. I zipped around town on the back of a Tibetan monk's motorcycle. I mean, why not? Chanted OM with a yogi for an hour after doing some Ashtanga yoga. Went to see this massive fort with a Romanian woman and two Kashmir Indians.  Had tea with an auspicious 75 year old man with white hair, formerly from New York who has Parkinson's disease. He was traveling the world for 44 years before he got sick, and he gave me a list of spiritual books to read and healing centers to know about, including something called Urine Therapy! Oh, it's a real and legitimate thing... Google it, totally wild! Could we have the ability to heal ourselves all along?? It was brought to this world by Mahatma Gandhi himself. What would you do? Radiation "treatment"  poisoning your entire body for the rest of your life, shackling you as a prisoner of sickness, to serve as a financial lifeline to the healthcare industry or... Drink your own pee? The choice is always ours...  

    Back to the adventures- Climbed a mountain with an Indian guy, at night, in the middle of an astoundingly beautiful snow storm to get to an Ashram for a full moon, devotional music, chanting session with a Guru. When we arrived it was me, two French girls, one Russian woman, and one Hungarian girl singing, eating, and dancing it up for the night as the Indians sang mantra and played the djembes.  Took an all day Tibetian Cultural tour with a Tibetan tour guide and this far out 65 year old man named Steven (originally from Portland) who spent the last 11 years living in rural places around South America, has done ayahuasca 61 times, and really likes his Indian hash. I also went on a quest with him to meet the Dali Lama's oracle so he could give him a letter from another spiritual leader in Rishikesh. Yep, you read that right. Yes, the Dali Lama has an oracle and he did get to give him the letter. Pretty wild stuff! Is this the Matrix? Well, I don't "know Kung Fu"...yet.  

     Next, I went on another quest in search of a temple that is known as a Shakti Peeth for the ears. The belief is that if a woman goes to the specific Shakti temple for the body part she has dis-ease with,  miraculous healing powers have occurred.  I have a hearing problem and inner ear imbalance issues.  Now, I read about this before I left for India and spent a lot of time trying to find the exact location of this temple because it's not a very famous one.  In fact, most people don't even know about it. I found these obscure directions online that point you to a Shiva temple and then tell you to follow the red string at the top of the temple that will be attached to the Shakti Peeth across the street!  I printed these directions out and brought them to India, it's been part of my mission from day one. There are 51 Shakti Peeths for various body parts spread all over India and the fact that the one for the ears is in the same area as one of my destinations was definitely a sign for me to make this happen. 

      I spent two days asking different tour guide services and no one knew. They kept leading me to other people around town. Finally I met this incredibly nice yogi named, Vittender. He's in his early 50's and had the gentlest eyes I have ever seen. All intuition says, this guy has an amazing heart and is a good person.  We did an hour long chakra meditation followed by chai and a long discussion about the power of meditation and kundalini yoga that I filmed.  Then I showed him the piece of paper with the directions which is feeling more and more like a treasure map at this point. He tells me he's pretty sure he knows which one I'm talking about... This Shakti Peeth I am searching for is called the Jaydurga temple and it turns out it's in this little town called Baijnath, 3 hours away. Vittender offers to take me there the next day with a driver. He says there are other temples along the way and we could make a whole day of it for 1800 rupees, which is less than $30. 

  I must say, India is such an incredibly wild force of its own that all you can do is surrender to its madness, having nothing but radical trust in God and your intuition (which is definitely heightened here). It's all about meditating  and staying on that spiritual frequency above all the chaos. As the Guru said in Rishikesh: in prayer you are doing the talking and asking but in meditation it is God who does the speaking and it is you who does the receiving.  So far God, the Universe, has only  lit the path with beautiful people, showing me nothing but protection. In silencing the my mind/ ego and listening to the heart, I went with this yogi on my adventure and it was perfect. Just him, me, and the India driver. Vittender is devoted to his spirituality and was able to explain every symbolic part about each temple. Giving me a one-on-one opportunity to learn more about all the Gods and Goddesses along the way. 

    We made it to the Shakti Peeth for the ears and there was a couple getting married there! It was a small, simple temple resting on a huge cliff.  It was beautiful to watch and be apart of the ceremony. And when I say apart of... I literally was apart of it. Vittender told me to just go ahead inside the temple, which was about ten times smaller than most of  my Aunt's closets, and do what I needed to do. He stayed outside and filmed so on camera you literally see me at the altar putting holy water in my ears while this young couple wearing large head pieces and the Brahmin marrying them are chanting something in Hindi directly next to me. Pretty random!  I hope it's good luck in India to have a redhead pop in on your wedding ceremony?  Haha. Afterwards I sat on the mountain and did my meditation to Shakti and then prayed/asked for help with my imbalance issues. I'll keep ya posted on what happens with all this. ;) Either way, it was another great adventure that was so powerful to do alone, uninterrupted by anyone else's opinions, chatter, or thoughts. Just me having an individual experience in which I again get to play witness to my decisions, reactions, and emotions.  Being away from everything that defines you, where you actually wrote the script everyone in your life abides by. You begin to see what you thought your comfort zone was... is really nothing more than an illusion of confined perimeters.  We're always capable of so much more and life never stops waiting for us to live. 

    

Be Here Now

    I'm staying at this great little place called The Green Hotel  up in Dali Lama Land and I have to thank Kai number 1 for finding it. I have a deck with a spectacular view, flat screen TV with HBO, Queen size bed, wi-fi, room service, and a heater all for 1100 rupees a night which comes out to precisely $17. 69 per night. I've had my laundry done twice so far- fluffed and folded for 8 bucks- and they've got a cool cafe packed with westerners and Tibetan monks 24/7.  This little Tibetan woman, prolly like 30 years old, runs the whole place and keeps a pretty tight ship! Her staff is made up of Indian men and boys and it's quite amazing to watch her hustle and flow. We've become good friends and she knows every time I walk in I'm gonna want hot water for my Tibetan medicine and a ginger, honey, lemon tea. Ginger, honey, lemon tea is all the craze up here. All over India all you hear- chai, chai, chai... In McLeod Ganji it's all about the GHL. She also knows I only like a little steamed milk on the side and not directly in my coffee in the morning and she let's me use the phone whenever I want to make local calls. Seriously, I could call America quits and move here in a heartbeat. 

    There's nothing more exciting than truly being able to live in the unfoldment of the presence. To just sit back and play witness to your own current reality as it reveals the day's adventure day after day. To the point where "days" no longer have a feeling or sense of importance because you get to just merely exist.  I haven't known what day it is pretty much since I got to India. I know the date and check in with the time, from time to time. But as for Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday... Those names have gone out the window for me. There's no need for such specifications while traveling. A Monday feels the same as a Saturday and the weekends are no different from the weekdays, they all just keep passing by. I leave my place at sunrise, returning to it after sunset ,and all that takes place in between... Well, that's the magic of living in the moment. 

    I arise with absolutely no plan for the day. I grab some breakfast where I meet a Tibetan Monk who tells me how to get to the Dali Lama's temple. Ok, I shall go to the temple today. I head down temple road and the street is lined with amazing shops full of spiritual goods- Buddhas, Shivas, jewelry, rare stones, gems, healing bowls, paintings, rugs, scarves. So much incredible stuff!  I stop in a couple of shops and end up somehow buying all new bedding. I didn't even know I needed or was looking for bedding but when he said everything for you is just $75. I said done! Ha. It is really pretty though. I'm almost at the temple when I get stopped by an older man, like 45 years old, and I can instantly feel he's one of those schmoozing, sleazy, sharks. He insists I come into his shop where he offers me a shot of whiskey and a cig.  I decline but before I leave he tells me there's a nice long hike to the Tibetan library that I should go see. Cool, I'd like to see that. He gives me directions and has served his purpose so I continue on. 

    The temple is a lot simpler than I expected. Just a couple of statues in a room, but they are remarkable and definitely hold a presence of magnitude. The Dali Lama's home is right next to it. You can look into his windows and again it's pretty modest. I do a round of Om Mani Padme Hum on my mala and continue on. In front of the temple's gates there are 2 guards in full uniform hanging out in an army tent. They ask me if I'd like to come in for some chai. Sure why not!  I walk in and there are two cots with their clothes hanging around and a little refrigerator.  They take turns sleeping in the tent -while on duty- to always be patrolling the gates. I chill with them for a good hour just chatting about the Dali Lama over a burning fire while sippin some chai. Next I begin my journey down to the library. It's a beautifully long hike down a winding road with temples, healing centers, and chai stands on the way. Monks and other trekkers are on the path with me. Cars and bikes constantly speed by. It's just me, myself, and I and I'm loving it. There's no sense of being "alone" because I am with me! Everything I do is an opportunity to truly watch myself and how I interact with life. 

     I make it to the bottom and the library is under construction but I get to see it anyways, it's cool. Again very modest. But I realize now I am in the actual area where the Tibetan government in exile resides.  I decide I want to understand more about what's really going on with this terrible oppression. I walk into the Religious and Cultural Affairs department and they direct me to a media counselor. I sit down with this nice Tibetan man in his government office and he launches into the whole history and story of the oppression, the autonomy of Tibet, and the Middle Way policy of the Dali Lama. It's devastating, terrible, and cruel yet inspirational, powerful, and beautiful at the same time. I shall talk more about Tibet and its people at another time. I have a lot of literature to read but it's something I'm very interested in. 

   On my ascent back up the mountain it's breathtaking with beauty: The snow capped mountains in the distance. The random cows and bulls passing you on their own journey of solitude. The monks, school children, tourists... Life literally passing you by as you pass it by in return. No thoughts but enjoyment. I see a little hole in the wall, well- more like hole in the mountain, and stop in for a paratha. There's a girl taking orders while another girl works behind a couple of small burners. 2 old men chat with a monk and there's another female traveler on a solo journey enjoying her present unfoldment at the table opposite of mine. Simplicity is magnetic. Overall the hike ended up being a 10 mile journey that took me all afternoon. I make it back to the Green Hotel where my hot water and GHL tea await me. While watching the sun slip behind the Himalayas for the night, I can't help but feel like I'm in the creation of a painting.  Just as each stroke of the brush creates a new dimension and adds  new layers to the totality of the piece. I too am working towards the creation of totality with inside myself. Ram Dass, thank you for your words: Be. Here. Now. 

Life is but a frequency

    We arrived at McLeod Ganji on the first of February. I know awesome name, right? It's pronounced Mcloud Ganj, like ganja without the A. It's a small town at the top of the Himalayas where the Dali Lama lives and where the Tibetan Government in exile resides. This place is crawling with Tibetan monks in red robes, tourists, and Kashmir Indians. It's way more like Tibet than India. The food so far as been amazing all across the board. I haven't had one problem and definitely will not be shedding the 10lbs I had planned on losing. After that cruise in the beginning of January, I felt like I came to India in a fat suit of myself and was actually looking forward to a little India sickness. But I've been breakfast brunching with eggs, chopsticking the hell out of the chow mien and just loving the Tibetan momos ( like pot stickers) and Parathas ( Indian flat bread stuffed with veggies and cheese with butter and pickled spicy garlic on top). Each meal cost about 150-350 rupees only, which is about $2.40- $5.66! It's all super fresh and made to order, nothing is packaged or packed with preservatives. 

     Also there was absolutely no reason for me to bring 6 rolls of toilet paper and 3 large ziplock bags full of medicine. Hypochondria Americana at its finest, that's for sure. Back in Amritsar, Kai number 2 actually got me some amoxicillin at a pharmacy stand for my ear infection and it felt better the very next morning. Now I'm taking all natural Tibetan medicine 3 times a day for general health and it's been great. Got 6 months supply for 32 bucks! There certainly was no need to drop that $200 at Whole Foods on wellness elixirs and immunity boosting vials! Damn you Whole Foods for always making everything sound so enticing and necessary. 

     My friend was only here for 1 day and left. It's time for me to travel on my own and the second we started ascending this mountain my energy immediately shifted as I knew this was the place I will be journeying alone. My fear instantly melted and I felt a sense of power and protection. Especially since the Dali Lama is here right now, I haven't seen him yet but he's got a pretty big auric field.  I've been chanting Om Mani Padme Hum 108 times on my mala. Actually way more than 108, that's just one time around the mala. This mantra is the highest frequency of compassion, purity, and love. It's the core mantra of the Dali Lama and Tibetan Buddhism. For more on this powerful prayer from the His Holiness himself,  please see link: http://www.sacred-texts.com/bud/tib/omph.htm  I've seen so many people and monks walking around all day reciting, what you could call, this holy prayer on their malas. Just cruisin the streets on the frequency of mantra. I had to see what this was all about so I spent a full day climbing from one side of the Himalayas to the other chanting as I walked the streets, traversed the mountains, and scaled the main waterfall. Other than stopping a couple of times for people to get their one snap  up the waterfall, I was in solitude. 

    It was on this magical day that I had the auspicious pleasure of meeting the white monkey! At first I walked by him casually thinking- oh wow, that's a white monkey- cool. Then I was like, wait what?? That's a white monkey!! I almost just walked right by the only white monkey in the land. Luckily, I got myself a one snap and we both went on our merry ways. The Buddhist say the white monkey is a sign of purity. The next beautiful little moment or sign I recieved was- I was literally scaling over rocks in the center of the waterfall when something caught my eye. I walked over to it and resting next to a rock was a random 4 of hearts card. This is significant because the 4th chakra is the heart chakra, it's all about the love.  So here I am chanting Om Mani Padme Hum, which in the easiest of terms, breaks down to love, purity, and compassion, and I am clearly shown two beautiful signs of love and purity. Incredible! 

     Then, at the end of the day as I was walking through the streets. This shop owner waves me down, he's about thirty and his name was Taj. He asks me to come in and have a look around and I thought why not. I walk in and his floor is lined with these amazing Tibetan healing bowls. He explains that each bowl has a specific vibration to open a specific chakra and helps purify the whole body. Cool. Then he tells me he feels that I have very strong energy and if I'd like he can show me how they work right now in the shop. Sure! I take off my shoes and lay down on this carpet he lays out. He begins placing all these bowls on top of me and filling them with different levels of water. The water is to absorb the negativity and must be immediately dumped out after. Then using a special stick he lightly begins playing the bowls and it's incredible! Seriously, my whole body was vibrating. I told him about my hearing problem and vertigo and he began massaging my tempos while placing a bowl on my third eye. The sound made my whole head, brain, nervous system... everything light up! 

    Forty five minutes later I walked out of there feeling like I was on top of the world! So much energy coursing through me and everything seemed like it was glowing- like I was on ecstasy or something. All my senses were heightened and in that moment, after having such a powerful day, I truly understood the idea that we really are all just vibrations resonating on different frequencies throughout the universe.  And that the use of sound current is a very powerful tool.  I felt amazing. Still feel amazing!  Now, in the US someone could've very easily charged about $100 or more for a 45minute chakra sound healing but he didn't ask for any money or try to get me to buy anything. He was just simply being... Compassionate. And there's my Om Mani Padme Hum come full circle.  This land is so beautiful and that whole day was such a divine example of how God, the Universe, whatever you connect with, is alway there-always speaking to us- through us. It's just up to US to get out of the way and listen. Hear your own frequency. Om Mani Padme Hum.